Friday, November 06, 2009

A botched escape attempt, that I was THREATENED to facilitate! (Personal entry)

By request, all of the relevant names and places have been aliased.

The Thursday before the Fall semester started, (Natalya) told me that her boyfriend (at the time) (Graham Curry) emailed her and asked for me and her to come to (Collenzae), MO to "rescue" him from his abusive fianceé, (Mushira Saddick). (Natalya) offered to pay me for the trouble.

On that Friday, (Mushira) was supposed to be at work being a receptionist for (Graham)'s mom's business, so (Graham) was supposed to be home alone with his Dad (whom we could slip by unnoticed) while his roommates were also at work. That's what we were told in our email.

I had a few bad experiences the last time I took her to (Collenzae), so I really didn't want to go, no matter how much she paid me. (I figured it would be no more than $200.) I asked her why (Graham) couldn't provide his own way out of his misery he called home. She said his car broke down, and there's no other car he can take to leave in.

I then asked her why he couldn't just get a taxi to the airport and fly a regional flight to Manhattan. Turns out, that a trip from (Collenzae) to the national airport in (Summerlawn) would be a little over 50 miles. At $2.50 a drop and $1.80/mile, it would be about $100 after tip. (I later found out that the closer (Chavez), MO had an airport, but that's beside the point, as I didn't think of it at the time.)
I really did not want to waste the remaining days of my summer trying to help a friend escape, which I ALREADY knew was VERY LIKELY to FAIL! I then asked (Natalya) to ask (Graham) to just hitchhike. After all, I would have hitched a ride out of a place I was that miserable in. (This was just hearsay from (Natalya) that (Mushira) was being abusive and harsh to (Graham). I didn't have verifiable proof to back it up.)

(Graham)'s phone ran out of minutes, and calling the house-phone was not an option because (Graham) lived in a separate mini-house across a way from the family's trailer, so the others were most likely to answer the phone first. They had been instructed by (Mushira) not to forward (Natalya)'s calls to (Graham) because that would ruin their path to marriage.

(Natalya) emailed back (Graham) some of my suggestions and what-not, but we both knew that since (Graham)'s internet access was sporadic, it would be several days before we got a response, and his last email instructed us to spring him out of (Collenzae) that Friday.

(Natalya) also pointed out that hitchhiking wasn't possible for (Graham) because he also wanted to take his computer and MANY of his belongings with him, so only a transport by car would make that possible.
I told her that I REALLY, REALLY hated to drain the remaining days of my summer on an escape attempt that was likely to fail, so I told her that "maybe this relationship wasn't meant to be. Maybe if he's really unhappy with (Mushira), he can find the will to break it off with her and find his own way to escape!"

(Natalya) wouldn't budge from her nourishing (Graham)'s weakness, so:


She was planning to live in a room next to mine in my apartment here in Manhattan, and to take classes at K-State. I was in charge of her well-being.

The threat she made was that she was going to move to Kansas City, room with her friends and find a job there if I did not take her to (Graham). I absolutely ABHOR long drives (unless I was paid like $1/mile both ways) and I knew that I knew that I knew that I knew that I knew, that this was going to fail somewhere. I just had this extra-strong intuition that this escape attempt would get heavily botched!

I am very much the opposite of a "morning person," so she made ANOTHER demand that I did not appreciate- that I get up by 6:15 and leave by 6:30. Moreover, she had decided to just pay for my gas, toll, and food, nothing extra. I knew I was going to gain absolutely nothing out of this escape attempt. (I gained something unrelated, but I'll touch upon that soon.)

I managed to get up anyhow, and not be as cranky and cantankerous as I thought I was going to be, and left together.

We were down in (Seminolehead), MO by 10:00 or so, and that's when (Natalya) told me to call the (Curry) residence. She didn't want to do it herself because she was afraid her voice would be recognized. I called, the Mom, (Charlene) (Curry), answered. I said I was one of (Graham)'s friends, and whether I could speak to him. She said he was "running some errands." I took a power-nap, and we waited until about 11:00 to go to his place on (Highway NN) right outside of (Collenzae).

When we reached there, the road on the thickly-forested hill was laden with mini rock outcroppings, and it was so rough and unkempt that I swore something in it was going to tear a vital tube or component on the bottom of my car. Many decrepit objects laid strewn across their forested property, and several broken-down cars dotted it as well. I figured that maybe the rough and unevenness of the jagged excuse they called a "driveway" caused those cars to stop functioning.
(Natalya) wanted to be let out to hide in the forest in case anyone else was there. I had to go up there alone.

Extra bad luck

As I struggled to get the car up the driveway, a red Oldsmobile Alero followed me. (Natalya) called a few seconds later to notify me that somebody is following me, so that was a pointless conversation.

When I parked the car, (Alva) came out of the Oldsmobile. He's not related to the (Curry)s, but is a good friend of (Graham)'s who got kicked out of his parent's house when he turned 18, and couldn't find a place to stay, so the (Curry)s provided him shelter.

I asked him where (Graham) was, that I needed to speak to him because it was very important. He asked if this was about (Natalya), and I just responded that it's something pretty important. He went away for a bit.

Then I dialed the 700 Club at 1-800-759-0700, and asked for a prayer for success in getting (Graham) out of there. During the prayer, (Alva) started approaching me like a creeper in an alley. I had thought I made it abundantly clear that I was on a call by putting a phone up to my ear. Maybe I should've turned on "Speakerphone Mode" so that he'd have gotten the hint. He interrupted the prayer someone was giving me, and told me that it's not (Natalya)'s place to try to decide for (Graham) who he's going to be with, so that we both had to leave.

I think his interrupting the prayer that the counselor was giving me caused the message not to be sent to God. Or maybe it got sent to God, and he disregarded it since I couldn't have the willpower to keep concentrating on the prayer uninterrupted. Or maybe, God planned this failure all along because (Natalya) and (Graham) were never "meant to be." If that was the case, why did he have to facilitate (Natalya)'s threat to coerce me to take her to (Collenzae)?

(Alva) then went up to the separate mini-house and told something to a friend. Then we briefly went in the house, and I saw (Natalya) briefly. Then she disappeared out the back. After (Alva) made threats of beating me up, I called (Natalya) to tell her this, but she didn't pick up the call. Then we both started looking for her around the property and around the forest; she was nowhere to be seen.

(Natalya) hid

I kept calling her repeatedly and her phone still took me to voicemail. I left numerous voicemails that day.

Since (Alva) threatened me, I unhooked my pepper spray from my keychain and kept it in my pocket. I then felt confused as to how and why (Natalya) would just disappear on us like that. He told me to call (Charlene) to ask her if she thought it was okay with us being there. He dialed her, and gave his phone to me.

It was (Charlene)'s (Spine-care) office in nearby (Peoplesdale).
I asked her what her stance was on me and (Natalya) being there to visit (Graham), and she said that "it's up to (Graham) and (Mushira)," and that they were getting married in a week. I also told her of (Alva)'s threat of physical violence, then I handed the phone back to (Alva).

I guess whatever (Charlene) told him must've spooked him because after he got off the phone, he told me that he wasn't really intending physical violence; that he was just trying to get me to leave, which wouldn't happen unless we could find (Natalya) again.

I saw (Graham)'s dad (who was actually in his 70s) take a huge bag of trash into a van because his dumpster is actually in (Peoplesdale); there's no trash pick-up for his property. As soon as the dad was loading his trash bags into the van, I saw (Graham) and (Mushira), holding hands, pace-walk to the van. (Alva) told me not to go after them. I asked him what would've happened if I tried to confront him. He said that (Mushira) would've just rushed him toward the van faster.

It turns out that he talked to (Graham) when he went up to the house, and when (Alva) told (Graham) that (Natalya) was here, (Graham) was like, "Oh, ooookay!" My first thought when he left with (Mushira) was that if he tried to stay, he would displease (Mushira) and he did not want to risk getting on her bad side, so he had to pretend that he was compliant to (Mushira), but I'm not sure what the true story is there.

While we waited for (Natalya), we went inside the trailer and that's when (Alva) told me that (Graham) likes to pull jokes on people like that. He likes to lie for his own personal entertainment, so it would entertain him to see us try to come here to get him to escape with us. (Alva) said that he even doesn't know when to trust (Graham) anymore, because he's compulsive like that.

I told (Alva) that if (Natalya) doesn't show her face by 1:00, that we'd call the (Santa Clara) County Sheriff to send a search-and-rescue team to the property to find (Natalya). We kept looking around the property, and the dense forest around it. Still no sign of her. I kept attempting her cellphone numerous times.
1:00 was approaching, and our conversation became more amicable in the meantime. We were almost making each other smile, in fact, because we've gotten comfortable with each other. I told him that I needed their non-emergency number because I didn't want to pay $50 to Alltel "per incident." (That meant $50 for every 911 call I placed.) He looked up their non-emergency number on the Internet (that he provided himself out in the boonies with an Alltel USB satellite internet receiver.)

I dialed the number as soon as 1:00 approached, and (Alva) relayed the address to me as it was hard to remember it myself. I gave them the rundown of her - that she was 18, and etc.

(Natalya) comes back!

Then (Natalya) appeared out of nowhere from the kitchen and waved to me. (Maybe she was hiding under the kitchen sink? Who knows?) That's when I emphatically told them that we just found her; she's right there, so we don't need for them to come after all, and I wrapped up the call.

That's about the time when (Mushira) returned with (Graham)'s father. I kept my face turned away as often as I could because I didn't want to show my face to (Mushira).

We both used the restroom, (Alva) had a brief exchange with (Natalya), then we both left unceremoniously.

We headed to (Peoplesdale).

I remembered where (Graham)'s mom's (Spine-care) clinic was, from our last visit in May. We visited them, and sat down with (Graham), (Charlene), and her co-worker/friend. (Natalya) pulled out her marriage certificate that she and (Graham) both got in a courthouse months ago (and that I wasn't aware of until I was in that office.)

We also wanted to know why (Mushira) was there with him, and (Alva) as well. I don't remember why (Mushira) didn't leave for work that day, but (Alva) told me earlier that he was laid off from a job so he was coming back home from filling out job applications. We were there to clear up many confusions.

(Graham) said that he wanted us to come the FOLLOWING week. Well then, he should've specified a DATE, not just a day. Maybe what (Alva) was telling me was right - maybe (Graham) was lying for entertainment, because who else would want to leave such a gaping loophole that was not giving the date? (That date wouldn't have worked anyway because that would've been our first week of classes.)

We were talking to get things caught up and cleared up, when (Mushira) showed up from the back and put her hands on his shoulder. Somehow, her intuition told her that we were going to head straight to where (Graham) was in (Peoplesdale) to confront him, so she decided to "save the day" from us.

At that point, (Charlene) told us to "go home," and that she doesn't mean any rudeness or discourtesy, but that she'll make (Graham) decide whether to be with (Natalya) or (Mushira), and that if he was going to be with (Natalya), he'd contact her in a few days. (Also, if he chose (Natalya), (Charlene) would place (Mushira) in her own apartment in Kansas City and give her enough resources to start life on her own.)

Shortly after we left, I thought of another compelling argument: "Perhaps (Mushira) doesn't seem abusive to (Graham) in front of (Charlene) and others to put on a showcase cover, but that she is harsh toward him "behind the scenes" when it's only the two of them, and that (Charlene) should consider that probability." I entertained this thought to (Natalya), and she told me to turn around to tell them.

I asked (Natalya) to, since I didn't want to have anything to do with this situation, and she insisted that I do it. I wasn't comfortable dealing with situations that weren't even mine, as I wasn't even comfortable going on this trip, as expressed earlier, so I told her I wasn't going to do it unless it was to just park out of view and wait for her as she went in and told it to them herself.

((Natalya) also mentioned some time ago that (Mushira) has a tendency to get violent, as she once did toward (Natalya), so that was why she was afraid to go in there. Well, (Mushira) getting violent in front of (Charlene) would be bad form towards (Charlene), so there wasn't as much to be afraid of as (Natalya) had thought.)

At this point, I knew it was over.

I wanted this to be over, and to be out of there as soon as possible, so we got to a Dairy Queen in (Chavez) (that (Graham) used to work and be miserable at,) then got our meals and headed north towards Kansas City.

We were somewhere in Johnson County when we took a nap at a parking lot of a Taiwanese restaurant. Then I called Jacob Holland, a close, good buddy of mine from my years at Navigators. I told him that I would make good on my promise to swing by his house whenever I was in the area. We were excited to hear each other, and I promised I'd be there by 6:30 (or was it 6?)

I went toward his part of Kansas City, but got lost in some industrial area and had to guess where to turn. I eventually got it right and arrived as the day was dusking.

I turned a sad day happy for both of us because it's always a blessing to visit each other, and always improves our moods. We got caught up on a LOT of things in life, and he expressed his opinion on the LDS, as he saw from some of my previous status updates and Note entries that I have become a part of the LDS. Then he gave me a large, black book about the LDS that he urged me to read.

It was "One Nation Under Gods: A History of the Mormon Church" by Richard Abanes. Since it's such a large book, and I have 16 credit-hours to work on this semester, I may get to it right after the semester concludes.
We also talked about their first daughter Adie, and how she's progressing along. Then after a few more updates on our lives, and introducing (Natalya) and her plans for her college life, we said our good-byes and headed home.


At first, I thought (Graham) was a pretty decent guy whenever he'd visit our house. I found nothing wrong with him thus far. Then we visited his (maternal) grandparents near Kansas City, and their house, though kinda small, looked cozy and fine. He was staying there while going to UMKC for some time. They all seemed decent, so I didn't think negatively of him yet.

Then when we visited his actual place in (Collenzae) in May, not only was the family trailer unkempt and poorly-maintained, his mini-house was MUCH more unkempt! He left things strewn all over the place! I expressed my feelings about this to (Natalya), and she defended (Graham) that time by saying that he doesn't have time to clean up because he has to work (and apparently substitute-teach Arabic) so much. Even though his living space's uncleanliness caused me to think that he is not the right guy for (Natalya), I gave a little benefit of the doubt and started to assume that maybe he would take the time to clean if he had the time.

When I read and heard that (Mushira) was seeing (Graham), but that (Graham) was still kind of interested in (Natalya), that casted more doubt into me. My suspicions that (Graham) wasn't right for (Natalya), grew. I had a gut feeling somewhere that (Natalya) had to cut off the relationship with (Graham). Not only did this long-distance relationship make me think so, his love triangle with (Mushira) and my sister caused me to think that (Natalya) is so much better off with someone else.

When we returned to make a botched rescue attempt on (Graham), I had managed to check out (Graham)'s (and now (Mushira)'s) living spaces in their mini-house. It was as messy and strewn about as before; the only addition being that there was an extra bed next to (Graham)'s. I told (Natalya) that since (Graham) didn't have a job, he would now have to have time to clean up after himself. She couldn't counter-argue that.

Also, if (Mushira) cared at all about her living space's cleanliness, she would've gotten them to tidy up the place together. Apparently (Mushira) is the true soul-mate of (Graham) because she cares about tidiness just as little as he does! I could not put up with that, and I would not want (Natalya) to put up with that either. (She said she would help clean up for (Graham). Oh, what a way to BABY that kid, eh? (Graham) was two years OLDER than (Natalya), by the way.)

Now she's seeing someone named "Tim," and he's from Topeka. He can just give her a ride himself, but if (Natalya) ever needed me to bring her to Tim's house, I would be happy to give her a ride there, as Topeka is just a little over an hour from here. To evaluate how good Tim is, I would also need to visit his apartment here in Manhattan. I would have to ask (Natalya) to clear it with him, but I have good hopes that Tim keeps his place better than (Graham) did, and that he is an overall better guy to (Natalya) than (Graham) was.

(Graham)'s chapter in our lives officially closed when he and (Mushira) got married, and I didn't have much of a good opinion of the guy by the last time I saw him anyway, so I was fine to have (Natalya) and myself move on from him.


  1. Stating very generally: the people who ARE weird don't LOOK weird.

    And it looks like 'weird' wasn't the issue here.

    Alex had a lot of character flaws, I can see that much.

  2. You tell a good story plot-wise, and it is pretty easy to follow. As someone who doesn't know any of these people, though a little physical description and/or background character description and reminisces on past history would go a long way to help put a face on these characters. (ie. treat your nonfiction characters as characters)

  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

  4. Amy's comment, restored: "I think you're a freaking (klutz). You obviously don't know what was happening, so you shouldn't make any assumptions. You should have told your sister to go screw herself."

    My parents didn't want me to let her move to Kansas City. It was their directive for her to go to college at K-State, and if she decided to follow through with other plans, not only would she have gotten in trouble with them, I would have as well.

    I can bet that Amy will never reply, but how does she know Alex and Amira? If not, then why did this blog post interest her?

  5. Hi Christian,

    You can feel free to write whatever theories you like about me and Alex, but I would appreciate it if you used aliases or removed our names/locations/business names and such. Not only is it an invasion of my privacy, but it's also very unsafe for such detailed information to be posted all over the internet.

    Thank you.

  6. Dear Amira,

    Thank you for finding my blog! (How did you find it, by the way? Awesome job!)

    Looks like you are far more polite and amicable than Natasha made you out to be!

    Now, I will ONLY alias your names under the following conditions:

    1. Get Alex to unblock my account on Facebook.

    2. Have him let me know through a Facebook message how he feels about this blog post. (That way, I'll know right then that he has unblocked me.)

    Oh, and if I ever find out that he has blocked me again, I will restore your original names on this blog post.

    Thank you and have a good night.

  7. Hey,

    I actually found your blog because my sister told me about it. A family friend (who was originally told to mind her own business when she asked about my whereabouts) Googled my name and found out much more than she needed to know through your blog. Since it's causing problems for my family, I figured I'd ask you to take off the names and the tags and such so other nosey people can't bother my family about it.

    And sure, I'll have Alec unblock you, and even add you back as a friend. It was just that at that time, we weren't exactly happy with you and Natasha. But we realize you're not to blame, so I'd be more than happy to also add you as a Facebook friend.

    Also, don't forget to removed the name of Cheryl's business.

    Thank you,


  8. Okay, I checked Facebook and saw that "Graham" has no longer blocked me. I have changed the names, placenames, and the name of "Charlene's" business in this story.

    Thank you for your concern.


  9. Thanks for changing the names, Christian. I must say though, I do like the creativity put into the name changes. They're pretty nifty. Especially Peoplesdale. :)

    I'll have Alex send you that message you requested as soon as he has the chance.